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Saturday, 11 June 2016

I Think I Might Have An Impulsive Disorder - Discuss

Lads and Lassies,  I know I promised you lots of blogs after I finished with the Sunday World but the fact of the matter is, I actually don't want to talk about loosing weight any more.  I suddenly realised I was boring myself trying to come up with ways to talk about weightloss and not be boring.  

Now, when you find yourself being bored with yourself, you know you are becoming excruciatingly boring to everyone else.  That said, I am still hanging off the walls at 'Climbing Walls' Dublin and Donie is still my climbing partner and has saved my life, literally, about fifty times.  I am currently sporting two beautiful purple coloured bruises on my right shoulder, a cut on my left shin and several icky looking blisters on all eight of my fingers..... and yes, I do still love it. 

Which brings me to my next topic.  Kayaking.  My good friend Gill got a kayak recently and proceeded to tell me about the wonderful world of kayaking over a stiff gin and tonic (yep, I'm still drinking regularly) and of course I decided it would be a lovely calm hobby to join my good friend in.  Twenty four hours later, minus a heap of money I am the proud owner of a shiny red kayak.

What kind of Kayak I hear you ask...I am not really sure. How long is my paddle?.....Couldn't tell you.  After I spoke to an avid kayaker this afternoon and was bombarded with questions about my little boat I decided that showing a photo of it was the best way to go..I found out that my boat is bullet proof...that's good to know what with all the crime these days.  I could paddle to England in it if my arms would get me there, was another...not sure I am ready for that but also good to know.  

I was told that if I was going to go out on the ocean that I needed a handheld waterproof VHS...I couldn't find one anywhere on the tinternet that didn't look like an old video player, that was until I realized that I should have been looking for a VHF marine radio.  I was asked about life jackets and helmets and wetsuits and cags and boots and dry bags and all these other things that I would need, luckily enough I had some of these from the year before last when I took up diving and soon realised I was terrified of dying under water in a freak accident (which would have been entirely my own fault).

I thought it best that I quit that.  I was terrified to tell my partner that I was giving it up after spending so much money but it turned out she was delighted, as it happens she too thought I would die in a freak underwater diving accident, that I would have caused.  The only difference between her story and mine is that I would probably have taken my diving partner with me.

So I think this is the first time I have sat back in any of my nearly fourty years and asked, do I have an impulsive disorder or am I just a fun loving crazy lady who is afraid of getting old.  As I sit here scratching my head I'm praying that it's the later, I am also thinking, how the hell am I going to get that yolk onto a roof rack (that I had to buy) on my own?



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