How It All Started - My First Cabbagey Experience

First let me start by apologising for not posting in two days...This Christmas season is a very busy time and I just haven't had a spare second to do anything.  What with queuing for banklinks and standing behind people buying their Christmas Tracksuits and St. Stephens Day Tracksuit I haven't had time to do anything bar look upon these people with mild irritation and scratch my ass.

Anywho... back to where it all started...it was many moons ago and me being the outgoing over-energetic little tyke that I was secured the role of the Tin Man in the school musical 'The Wizard of Oz'.  

Now I know what your thinking...how come I didn't hold Dorothy's role..what with me being so talented an all. Well the fact of the matter was..I was tiny..and the costume for the Tin Man was for no want of a better word....minuscule.

The costume consisted of four cylinders and a box.  The cylinders were actually the inside roll that newsprint is printed onto so its like a really thick cardboard like material with about a three inch hollow circle in the middle of it.  

So basically they slid you into the two leg cylinders (which meant you couldn't bend your knees) they obviously weren't intelligent enough to cut the middle so the knee could bend, and then slid the box over the torso, then lashed on the two arms....no I couldn't bend them either.  Oh and then a silver funnel for a hat.

It was spray painted silver and was totally impractical.. I wobbled around the stage in rehearsals like a tool..unaware of this as I was only about eight. The only thing I was aware of was that it was really uncomfortable..I had bruises under my arms and in and around my arse and heals..defo a heath and safety hazzard.

So opening night came..the singing started and I was all ready with my costume pinching every inch of me.  I'm standing there ready to do my squeaky thing.  Dorothy puts oil in me..I start my song and as I go to wobble towards the audience for my "IF I ONLY HAD A HEART".....I went to step out...realised there was nothing there and fell off the stage..

Now you would think that I was rushed off to hospital to see if there were any injuries...nope, one of the staff just picked me up and placed me back onto the stage and I continued on singing through the tears...I put on the performance of a lifetime..

The following day they cut the cylinders so I could bend my knees and arms. The fall didn't deter me from performing..I performed many times after that...and had many more mishaps.

I am the one right in the middle in front of the mike...I was Silvest and this was at the Guinness Theatre and I had a broken left arm at the time...